'Because sex with Jack Harkness would be better ... IF IT WAS HOCKEY!!!!' by Kara
Monday, January 28, 2008 at 6:48 AM

Today is a very special day.

I GOT MY FIRST SPEEDING TICKET!!!

The cop was actually fairly patient with me and didn't yell or anything.

Funny. I got bullied less by police for something I did do than for something I didn't. My first direct experience with a cop went thus:

COP: HAVE YOU BEEN DRINKING!?!?

ME: Er ... no.

COP: Well, you're IN A DITCH!! How did THAT happen???

ME: I slid on a patch of black ice and spun out.

COP: *breathalyzes*

ME: *is breathalyzed*

COP: ... well ... okay ... you're sober ... so maybe you're telling the truth. BUT DON'T DO IT AGAIN!!

My second direct experience with a cop went thus:

COP: HAVE YOU BEEN DRINKING!?!?

ME: Er ... no.

COP: Well, you nearly ran into me when I was camped out in the business bit of a PARKING LOT with my LIGHTS OUT and my ENGINE OFF!! How did THAT happen???

ME: ... um ... can I see your badge?

COP: GETOUTOFTHECAR!!!

SECOND COP: Here's my badge. Did you go to college?

ME: ... yes?

SECOND COP: OKAY SMART GIRL RECITE THE ALPHABET BACKWARDS!!!!!

ME: *has to do the alphabet backwards*

COP: ... well ... okay ... you're sober. So go on. BUT DON'T DO IT AGAIN!!

Since then, I've been a very conscientious driver -- I have not once slid on black ice in slanting-down sleet in the dark, nor have I hit anyone illegally-parked at midnight -- just as I was told. Never mind that an innocent girl was antagonized twice by police officers because bringing in an 'underaged' DUI would look great for them.

The funny thing was? A friend and I were jaywalking in full view of two cops in the middle of London, nearly got run over by a motorbike and freaked out. A Hampton cop would have barged across the street and screamed at us. Know what the London cops did?

Looked at us and snickered.

Do cops in the UK have a quota? If not, I wouldn't be surprised.

If you have been, THAT WAS DANGEROUS!